Landmark Park

We went to Landmark Park yesterday and had a really fun family day. Landmark Park is a unique 100 acre outdoor turn-of-the-century farmstead located in Dothan, AL where families can experience the rich natural and cultural heritage of the Wiregrass Region.

First we walked around the farmstead, visiting the old schoolhouse and church where Sprout rung the churchbell. Next we walked through the azalea gardens and dodged bumblebees. Then we toured the old homestead, visited with the farm animals, and dunked the kids in the outhouse before heading over to the playground and picnic area.

Filch It Friday: Favorite Movie Quotes

I'm participating in a filching carnival hosted by one of my favorite Bloggers, Simply Nutmeg, and today is Filch It Friday. "Filch It Friday gives us all permission to beg, borrow, and steal anybody's post ideas, it gives us a way to recognize and give credit to our blog friends, and it holds the possibility of turning any post into a meme."

Want to join in the fun?
Here's how it works:
Write an original copy-cat version of the filched post. Don't just copy and paste their post!
Give credit to and link to the original author in your post.
Mention and link to Filch It Friday in your post.
Post on Friday and sign the Mr. Linky at http://www.simplynutmeg.com/!
Every week visit the blogs that have filched and consider filching from them on the following Friday. Thus, we'll be creating memes within a carnival!

Since this was Simply Nutmeg's idea and she has so many fabulous posts worthy of filching, I decided to start off by filching one of her posts- Guess My Favorite Movie Quotes.

Here goes, here are some of my favorite movie quotes. See how many you can get. Post your answers as a comment.

1. "You dumb stubborn redneck hick." Sweet Home Alabama . I thought this one was a gimmy but only Hanlie got this one.

2. "Well, I ain't exactly lactating right now, pal." Ice Age.

3. "How do you like them apples?" Good Will Hunting. Ruth, Robin, Kimberly and Clayjack got this one.

4. "AS... YOU... WISH" Princess Bride. Meg and Hanlie rocked this one.

5. "Take me to bed or lose me forever." Top Gun. Ruth, Kimberly, and Clayjack were on top of this one.

6. "Well, color me happy! There's a sofa in here for two!" Pretty Woman. Sarah got this one and even knows the song.

7. "Real loss is only possible when you love something more than you love yourself." Good Will Hunting again.

8. "...he don't know whether to scratch his watch or wind his butt." Steel Magnolias.

9. "... To make the journey and not fall deeply in love - well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived. " Meet Joe Black.

10. "Childhood is what you spend the rest of your life trying to overcome." Hope Floats.

11. "You're a neo maxi zoom dweebie, what would you be doing if you weren't out making yourself a better citizen?" Breakfast Club. Go Clayjack!

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And just to give credit where credit is due. I once filched a post from another one of my favorite blogs, Play Groups Are No Place For Children, before I knew what filching was. I gave her credit for the idea but just thought I'd give a little shout out here since it is one of my favorite posts- Caption Contest.

Wordless Wednesday- "My Girl"

I've got sunshine

On a cloudy day.

When it's cold outside,

I've got the month of May.

Well, I guess you'll say

What can make me feel this way?

My girl. (My girl, my girl)

Talkin' 'bout my girl. (My girl)

~The Temptations

True Jeans

I love a good fitting pair of jeans. The problem is things have shifted a bit since having 2 kids and I just can't seem to find that "perfect" pair these days. You know the ones that sit somewhere between my butt crack and my belly button, are long enough for my 5'9" frame and give my rear a little lift! Well lucky for me and the rest of you ladies who are searching for that perfect pair of jeans, 5 Minutes for Mom is offering yet another $200.00 gift certificate to TrueJeans.com where you enter your measurments online and the computer suggests jeans best suited to your measurements! Sounds good to me. Especially if they can help me look like the model to the left!

Why Do Zebras Have Stripes...

"Why do Zebras have stripes?"

"So people can tell them apart from horses."

"Mo-oomm, it's so emilys can't see them."

"Emilys?"

"E-m-e-n-i-e-s."

"Emenies?"

"For camoflauge Mo-oomm!"

"Oh, you mean so enemies can't see them."


"That's what I said."

************************************************************************

"Sprout, Feed the Dog."

"But, but, but..."

"You don't want your doggie to starve do you?"

"But I'm trying to eat my breakfast and I'm a starving little kid!"

Preparations for having kids......

This is from my friend Katie's Blog- The House of Payne!

Preparations for having kids......

Lesson 1
1.Go to the grocery store.
2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.
3. Go home.
4. Pick up the paper.
5. Read it for the last time.

Lesson 2
Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their...
1. Methods of discipline.
2. Lack of patience.
3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.
4. Allowing their children to run wild.
5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.
Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.

Lesson 3
A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...
1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static or some other obnoxious sound playing loudly. Eat cold food with one hand for dinner.
2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep. (who needs an alarm when your baby wakes up every 2 hours anyway!)
3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.
4. Set the alarm f or 3AM.
5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.
6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.
7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.
9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive). Repeat steps 1-9 each night.
Keep this up for 3-5 years.
Look cheerful and together.

Lesson 4
Can you stand the mess children make? To find out...
1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.
2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.
3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.
4. Then rub them on the clean walls.
5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.
6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?

Lesson 5
Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.
1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.
2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.
Time allowed for this - all morning.

Lesson 6
Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don't look like that.
1. Buy a chocolate ate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there.
2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.
3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinklecheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.
4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

Lesson 7
Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

Lesson 8
1. Hollow out a melon.
2. Make a small hole in the side.
3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.
4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.
5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.
6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air. You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.

Lesson 9
Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years.(I know, you're thinking What's 'Noggin'?) Exactly the point.

Lesson 10
Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly.(Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required).Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years.You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

Lesson 11
Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the 'mommy' tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.

Remember, a sense of humor is one of the most important things you'll need when you become a parent! Besides, without kids, what on earth would we blog about??????

Where's The Beef?

Cuz it aint here in Sweet Home Alabamer!

I went to Burger King drive-thru recently and ordered a cheesburger but they were out of hamburgers! How do you run out of hamburgers when you are the self-proclaimed King of Burgers? Ok, I didn't need it anyway.

Then just the other day we went to Taco Bell drive thru and ordered a few tacos for the Hubs and a kids meal for Sprout. Nothing for me, thank you very much. It's not that I don't like Taco Bell, I do, but I have been working really hard at trying to lose a few pounds lately. This was no easy task by the way as I LOVE food and enjoy eating, not to mention have very little will power when it comes to food. But I managed to stay strong and restrained from ordering the nachos drowning in ooey, gooey cheesey goodness! We pulled up to the window and waited forever and a day; this is in additition to the eternity we had already waited behind the car in front of us. We sat there, and sat there, and sat there with not so much as a glance from the employees so I did what anyone with a hungry husband and kids would do- I beeped my horn until someone responded! The someone who finally walked over to the window simply said,

"We're out of beef!"

Gotta love customer service!

So, it seems that there is a shortage of beef here in AL.

So we rolled the dice and headed over to McDonalds in search of something that resembles beef. Lucky for us, I mean, hubs and the kids, they had the beef -or some concotion of beef like substance! This, of course was torture for me. Not only did I have to bear going through one fast food drive-thru without ordering a thing but I had to endure two drive-thrus AND then smell the greasy yumminess all the way home. This was particularly hard for me as the smell of french fries was almost intoxicating. I think I may have mentioned a time or two (see 33& 34) that I LOVE french fries! They are one of my weaknesses and there is no better french fry than a hot and salty McDonald's golden grease stick to this french fry afficianado!


For some reason my turkey chili just didn't do it for me that night!


Maybe it's because it didn't have the beef...


Or the sour cream...


Or the cheese...


Or the corn muffin slathered in butter to go with it. :(

It's All Fun & Games Until Sprout Scrapes His Knee

Momma Had a Baby and It's Head Popped Off

Sprout and I had some Mommy and Me time yesterday and we went to the park and ran around like a couple of school kids. We played on the swings, seeing who could go higher. We attempted to cross the monkey bars but neither of us made it all the way across. We slid down the slides as fast as our bottoms would take us. Then Sprout starting picking flowers for me. He is sweet like that and always picks flowers for me and tucks them behind my ears. The first flower he picked up was a buttercup. I shared with him the old superstition that says if you hold a buttercup under your chin, and yellow light is reflected on your chin, it means that you like butter. We both like butter-no surprise there.

Then he picked up 2 dandelion puffs, handed one to me and as he got ready to blow, I told him to make a wish.

It was such a fun afternoon as I enjoyed passing along memories from my childhood to Sprout.

A short while later, Sprout picked up 2 dandelions and handed one to me. Before I even realized what I was doing, I shouted "Momma Had a Baby and It's Head Popped Off!" Nice huh? I didn't really think about it at the time. It just came out as naturally as if I was a young school girl at recess. I guess this is what a day at the park will do to a thirty-something Mom; bring one crashing back to her childhood with a loud thud. What kind of mother am I teaching this tortorous rhyme to my 5 year-old son? It's sick really, sick and twisted, if you think about it. Grabbing an innocent dandelion and holding it tightly beneath it's head and with one quick flick of the thumb the top goes flying into the air as we take delight in this morbid ritual. Who came up with this rhyme anyway and what was wrong with them? And why did this come flying out of my mouth after lying dormant for 20+ years with not so much as a blink of the eye? Sprout ofcourse thought this was hilarious and ran around grabbing dandelions and shouting "Momma Had a Baby and It's Head Popped Off!"

Then Sprout turned what is normally our dandelion puff wish ritual into "Momma had some babies and they all ran away" as he blew with all his might and watched all the little seedlings drift away. Oh what did I do?

I turned our fun afternoon of sharing memories and rituals into an afternoon filled with morbid, flower-killing games! We'll just file this one under 'Mother of the Year' award!

Did you play this game as a child? Do you know what the history behind it is?

Did you teach it to your children? On second thought, don't answer that one! ;)

Can I Have Some Cheese With My Whine?

A nice sharp cheddar or aged swiss would be nice.

I am so tired this morning. Literally tired but also so tired of being sick and tired of taking care of sick young'uns. I have not slept much the past three nights because Sprout has been up in the middle of the night either puking, pooping or crying. We finally got into the Doctor yesterday and he has strep (probably caught it from me) and a double ear infection so I know he is hurting and in pain. I feel so bad for the poor kid and wish I could take it all away- far far away. He has been home from school all week and understandably a bit whiney! The problem is, I am still recovering from my bout of strep and pneumonia and a little worn out. AND to make matters worse I have a major case of PMS so am a little irritable to say the least!

Last night I was a little grumpy and just needed a few minutes to unwind so I grabbed a book and curled up in the recliner. I was so tired I fell asleep while reading my book in a matter of minutes. I woke up at 11:30 and went to bed, or tried, at least. I am watching my friend's dog for the weekend and while he is a very sweet dog, he has a few quirks and likes to sleep in bed at night- at your head! The only problem with this is that he is a Pug. A Pug with some funky breath who snores alot, not to mention feels the need to lick himself quite often. (Sorry Melissa- you know I love your dog-it's just been a hard week!) My husband cannot stand the snoring and the licking and immediately started tossing, turning, grumping and covering his head with the blankets. Granted, the man needs his sleep, he is flying a multi-million dollar military aircraft, afterall, and as one might imagine, doing this on little sleep is not recommended! So, I tried to put Bugsy on the floor but he just whined. I tried to put him in the living room but he ran back and scratched at the door. Defeated, I grabbed a pillow and headed to the couch with the snoring, licking Pug with halitosis only to be woken up 2 more times for him to go outside. Then Austin was up before the ass crack of dawn complaining that his ear hurt-so the day began a little early today. Or maybe yesterday never ended. Either way, if you think of it, please send me a little patience, a lot of coffee and a nice piece of cheese to go with my whine. Because really, I don't think taking care of two priceless muchkins on little sleep is recommended either.

As for the dog- no worries, I put his licking to good use and am offering his cleaning services to you- free of charge (Click here). Hopefully he will be so tired by the end of the day today that he will fall asleep at the computer!

Cheers!

Can Somebody Please Explain This To Me?

How is it that when I call our medical clinic here on base at 7:00 am, right when they open, and am the 13th caller, that they have NO appointments left for the day. You mean to tell me that the 12 callers in front of me took ALL of the appointments for the day. So I guess this means that there is only 1 Doctor who works like 2.3 hours. So, I ask if I can make an appointment for the next morning and am told they don't make advance appointments - I will have to try to call back the next morning at 7 a.m. HELLO? McFly? That is what I just did and you have NO appointments! Did I miss something here? Is there a secret handshake or something I need in order to get an appointment... So, she asks me what is wrong with him. Ok, you asked lady...

He has been running a fever of up to 104 since Monday.
He started vomitting on Tuesday.
On Wednesday, he looked like he had pink eye and was complaining that his eye was "leaking."
His lymph nodes are huge!
He is complaining that his his cheeks and ears hurt.
His tonsils are SO big I can barely see past them.
This morning he had diarrhea-in his underwear-three times (correction, make that 5 times now)- because he couldn't make it to the bathroom in time.
Would you like me to continue?

At this point, she passes me along to a triage nurse.

After going through all of his symptoms again, the nurse informs me that they have no appointments but she can authorize a visit to the ER. Yeah that is just what I want to do with a sick five year old and a strong-willed almost 2 year old who hates being confined in any way shape or form! I said, I really don't think he needs to go to the emergency room...and am interupted by the nurse who informs me that I will have to call back at 7 a.m. the next morning for an appointment then- goodbye!

So this morning at 6:59, I was on the phone, ready and waiting to make an appointment. I was caller number 4 and when the lady tried to tell me that they had no appointments- lord help her, the Momma Bear came out of me like Sprout's diarrhea! Miraculously, or maybe it was out of fear for her life, she found an appointment at 1:20 this afternoon!

Now, can somebody please explain this to me because I just cannot make sense of it!

Wordless Wednesday-My Life

While we try to teach our children all about life,

Our children teach us what life is all about.~Angela Schwindt

Conversations with a 5 Year Old

About wearing clothes...

"Mom, why do we have to wear clothes?"

Completely caught off guard response...

"Um, because you can't just walk around the world naked" (unless of course, your part of the world happens to be a nudist colony).

"Why?"

Slighty recovered response...

"Uh, because we need to keep parts of our bodies covered when we are in public."

"But I don't like clothes and I didn't wear any undwear to school today (pause) can I watch Max and Ruby?"

"What?" (God help me, I'm raising a nudist)
Insert Max and Ruby
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About hat day at school (remember this picture-scroll down to second picture)...

"Did everyone like your hat?"

"Yeah, I told everyone that my Dad was a cowboy and stitched it for me!"

(chuckle) "Did you tell them you were kidding?"

"No!"
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About Blogging...

"Are you going to put that on your log?"

And how I know when I have spent too much time on the computer...

"You are always logging!"

Fun in the Tub

Sprite may be a strong-willed little young'un but there is always one thing that I can count on to turn that frown upside down...

She loves her some bathtime ...

And it's faces like this one that just melt all of my frustrations away...

And really, who can stay mad at a face like this?

Let's Get This Party Started-Right Now

It's party time! Come one, come all and "get your blog on!" The ladies over at 5 Minutes for Mom are hosting the Ultimate Blog Party 2008 and you don't want to miss it! There will be fun, friends and freebies- who could ask for anything more? Ok, I might ask for a few more dollars or a few less pounds but we can't have everything now, can we?

Now, let me introduce myself and welcome you here to Sweet Home Alabama! I’m Lisa, a northern girl who’s been temporarily transplanted in the deep south, where sushi is still called bait. You’ll notice that my blog is titled after the movie ‘Sweet Home Alabama.’ It combines my love for the movie and the southern colloquialisms and the fact that Alabama is Home Sweet Home-for now! I poke fun at the south and the state of Alabama but it’s all in good fun so don't go gittin yer gussie up-it’s how I cope! I also poke fun at my hometown- it was once in the Guiness Book of World Records for having the most bars per square capita. And no, I did not have my baby in a bar! But it sure has been an interesting journey transitioning from career woman to stay at home Mommy to two strong-willed young’uns, Sprout and Sprite, while my husband (aka Hubs) is a pilot in the US Army. Most days I don’t know whether to scratch my watch or wind my butt! You’re welcome to come along on this crazy journey but just be sure to bring your earplugs and bug spray; my kids are loud and the bugs are fierce. Or is it my kids are fierce and the bugs are loud? ;)

So what are you waiting for? Come on in and stay for a while- I make a mean Margarita! Introduce yourself and feel free to share an expression from your neck of the woods or poke fun at the north-I can take it! And remember, it's all in good fun, so don't go gittin as mad as a mule chewin' on bumblebees! And if anyone, who does not already know me and is not from my hometown, wants to take a stab at where I grew up, I'll throw in your choice of this or this for the first right answer!

Thanks for stopping by and ya'll come back now, ya hear!

With so many awesome prizes being given away it is hard to narrow it down but since I would really love a new blog design, my top three picks would be:

24 — Blog Design Provided by: Sweet ‘n Simple Design

45 — Custom Blog Design Provided by: Summer

67 — Blog Makeover Provided by: Shauna

And if my top three picks are already chosen, I’d love any of the following (in order of preference): 1, 14, 34, 12, 15, 61 or anything else related to babies and young children since I have an 18 month old and a 5 year old.

Thanks!!!!

Let Me Count the Ways

Let me count the ways... in which Sprite expresses herself these days:

Become disagreeable and refuse requests
Say "No"
Do the opposite of what I want
Say "No, No!"
Ignore me
Say "No, No, No!"
Reject me and go to someone else
Say No, No, No, No!"
Push away when I want to hug or kiss
Say No, No, No, No, No!"
Run away from me
Say No, No, No, No, No, No!"
Pull away and run into the street or another unsafe place
Say No, No, No, No, No, No, No!"
Do something after I have said not to- with a sneaky smile on her face
Say No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No!"

I started to count how many times she said "No" yesterday but I lost count somewhere after 1046.

We were at the Doctor's office yesterday and she was, shall we say, very disagreeable. She gets this from her father by the way! :) No matter what anyone asked her she said, you guessed it, "No." After exhausting my arsenal of toys, books, snacks, and drinks the Doctor, feeling my pain, finally gave her a lollipop just so she could listen to my chest and finish her exam.

While we were at the pharmacy waiting for my prescriptions, several older folks tried to say "Hi" and talk to her but her response was always, "No, no, no, no..." She says it several times in a row just in case we didn't understand her the first time! One gentleman after being rejected even came over and sat next to her. I know he was just trying to be friendly but she was obviously in a mood and did he really think that some stranger approaching her was suddenly going to make her better? She turned over in the chair and proceeded to have a little tantrum-even kicking the stroller. Then just to add insult to injury the Gentleman says, "Boy, she sure is cuttin up today, isn't she?" I just smiled and said, "I should have named her Mary- Mary, Mary Quite Contrary!"

I may have mentioned a time or two or 408...that Sprite is a very independant, strong-willed little girl. And while I joke about this a lot (it's how I cope) I do realize that most of this is fairly normal at this age and will serve her well in the future BUT man, can it be frustrating! If you have any secrets of success on surviving the endless No, No, No's, with hair still left on your head, please feel free to share. :)

Wordless Wednesday-Germs, Germs Go Away!

And Don't Come Back Another Day!

Strep and Pneumonia-Blech and double blech!

Happy Birthday Dr. Suess

Yesterday was Theodore Geisel's (better known as Dr. Suess) Birthday. Sprout has a fun-filled week ahead of him and actually wants to go to school this week. We were all feeling a little under the weather this weekend and Sprout even had a little Asthma trouble on Sunday so I thought for sure he would be staying home Monday. After all, this is what he looked like Sunday night:

But Monday morning when he woke up and I told him he might be staying home he actually begged, let me just repeat that, BEGGED to go to school. It was "Green Eggs and Ham" Day. They were having Green Eggs and Ham for breakfast and he was supposed to show off his Dr. Suess craft project that he made. He colored a fox, put socks on him and put him in a box filled with socks and a Knox! It was so refreshing to see him actually excited about going to school for a change.

Today is "Hats Off to Reading Day." They are going to be reading "the Cat and the Hat" and got to wear their favorite hat to school.

This is what Sprout chose. He sure does make a handsome Cowboy, doesn't he?

Tommorrow is "Wacky Wednesday" and they get to wear something wacky. Sprout had lots of ideas, many that cracked him up, but ultimately decided he wants to wear two different shoes. I love that he came up with up with the ideas by himself and decided which one he liked the best.

Thursday is "Fox in Sox" Day and they get to wear their favorite socks to school. Sprout has already decided that he wants to wear his tie-dyed socks that he made with his Aunt Dayna last summer. I will try to get a picture of this!

Friday is Dr. Suess Centers and Celebration!! I'm hoping to go in and help but I have to get my voice back first. I was supposed to go in and read a book to the class but I lost my voice with this most recent nastiness that has invaded our house once again! Anyway, I just love Dr. Suess books and can probably recite, "Mr. Brown Can Moo, Can You?", "There's a Wocket in My Pocket", and "Dr. Suess's ABC"-three of my favorites that I have read time and time again to Sprout and Sprite. So, thanks Dr. Suess for making school fun for my son this week!